Need I remind you?

There is an episode of the TV show Friends where Rachel believes herself to be pregnant.  She has already had one positive pregnancy test, but when Phoebe and Monica find out, they have her take another one.  Phoebe reads the test results for her and continues to tell her that she is not pregnant.  She then cries, even though she really didn't want to be pregnant in the first place.  Of course Phoebe was just testing her and then continues to say, "well now you know how you really feel!"  Well I start with that because I had a little bit of that scenario happen to me last week.  Jason and I have decided that 2 is it for us biologically, for many different reasons.  I have even recently said to my pregnant sister, "I am so happy you are pregnant and not me."  I genuinely feel that way, but once and awhile I get a feeling.  So last Friday I started to count days and started to get a bit panicked, but it hadn't been too long so I wasn't completely worried.  All I had to do was wait one day and I got my answer, but for a woman it only takes one day to come to terms with the fact that you may have another baby, and then you have your nursery colors picked out and names decided on.  My pregnancies are rough and the bed rest with the last one didn't help and of course there is that terminal disorder that our first child died from.  There is a list as to why we have made this decision, but of course I am a mother, I am allowed to have those moments.  That is why my husband is there to say to me, "need I remind you..."  So needless to say, I am okay with this, and we may adopt someday.  I also need to remind myself that my children sleep through the night, they feed themselves, 1 of 2 is potty trained and they can talk!!  I guess I need to start cherishing the little things that they do know so 10 years down the road I am not wishing they were toddlers again. God has truly blessed us with a wonderful family with two very expressive children!!